Here is a list of moments you might feel the urge to share. Below them are some examples of what you might say. The higher the number, the more personal the response.
Scene: Girls sitting in the lunchroom talking about menstrual cramps.
- Say: Nothing at all—let it pass or ask your friend a question about her weekend plans.
- Say: “Oh, that sucks. What do you usually do to feel better? Have you tried painkillers a heating pad?”
- Say: “I’ve never had cramps/period pain.” You could even ask them, “How does it feel?” if you want to know.
- Say: “I don’t have periods. It doesn’t seem like that much fun… “
- Say: “I won’t have periods. After all you’re saying, I’m kind of relieved!”
- Say: “I won’t have periods, and I also will have to adopt if I want kids. But plenty of people can’t have children with their bodies—it’s pretty common. 1 in 7 couples have trouble making a baby.”
- Say: “I have a condition that I was born with that means that I won’t have periods and I’ll adopt to have kids.
- Say: “Have you seen the MTV show ‘Faking It’? One of the characters, Lauren, has a condition like mine. It’s pretty cool, actually.”
There are lots of ways you can handle these discussions.
You can also offer advice (like “I’ve heard this is really good…”) or ask them questions.
Even when someone asks you about your period, you can answer truthfully (like “I’m not on a period right now”) without worrying about them knowing more than you want them to.
Your friend: “Oh man! I started my period—do you have a tampon?”
Your answer: “Nope—sorry! Maybe Ashley has one—do you want me to ask her?”
Or (if you carry some tampons around to help your friends (and some of us have done this before!)) “Yep! Sure do. Here you go.”*
More on carrying a tampon around when you know you don’t have periods
You can decide for yourself whether or not you want to carry around a tampon or pad for your friends. It’s another tool in your arsenal, if you feel like you need it. The most important thing is that you feel supported in sharing what you feel comfortable. How you talk about periods will probably change over time, and feel free to experiment with what feels right for you.